#15

As this semester comes to an end I've reflected back on what i;ve learned and achieved. I've learned a lot more more about analyzing text and understanding a deeper meaning. That was one of my goals I wanted to achieve and I wanted to be able to incorporate that into my writing. I still haven't gotten transitioning down or writing the perfect intro/conclusion so i plan to keep working on that. I will always need to keep developing as a writer but for know i need to learn to keep my papers focused more and relate everything back to my thesis.

#14

     The essay that i plan to revise is my ad analysis essay. My strengths were my attention to detail when analyzing in the paper and my evidence given. My weaknesses though were my somewhat weak thesis and forgetting some important things in the ad.
     To revise my essay I will start with making a stronger claim for my thesis. Doing this can help me focus on making stronger points and relate back to the thesis more with analysis. I will also make sure to look over the ad again to see what I missed that I can add to my paper. The more details and information i give, the easier it is for the audience to picture what I am talking about.
     I am also going to revise my introduction and conclusion. those are always my weaknesses. Having a better introduction and conclusion will help me keep my paper focused more. It will also engage the reader more.

#13

    The assignment that was my favorite and the one I will most likely revise would be the ad analysis. I really enjoyed this assignment because we were allowed to pick the ad we wanted. Being able to choose our own ad allowed us to pick something we were interested in and allowed us to challenge ourselves. I chose a vintage ad because I found there was alot to talk about and analyze. I find older ads lack discretion most of the time. With all the knowledge we have now it's easy to identify all the false claims that were made. Those ads would never work in present times.
    I enjoyed the process of writing the paper because it pushed me to expand my ideas further than i normally would. It also makes you try to find meaning in the most minor details that you never would have noticed before. However there were things I did lack expanding on. I forgot details about pictures and didn't always analyze the text as well as I could have. I want to rewrite this and get the A that I was so close to having.

#12

My thesis for my argument is sex education should be mandatory in schools starting from middle school or junior high.My most compelling evidence is whether plenty of teenagers and young adults know all the facts about sex there is still a high chance they will have sex anyways. It is important for them to know the facts about sex, STD's, pregnancy, and contraception so they can make a safe and informed decision. This evidence is strong because many people know the more information and knowledge you have about anything allows you the chance to make better decisions. Others may disagree and think that if they start learning about it they will start doing it. There really is no evidence to back up that claim what so ever. It is also better they hear the facts and truths from a safe educational environment as opposed to friends and random things they find off the internet. I don;t think having to argue the counter argument should be difficult. I think along the way I may find better evidence than what i have now. I also think I'll start my essay off with this because it dives right into the issue.

Assignment 11

From reading the "$78 million dollar bag" I learned more of what not to do when writing an argument. i found this essay had alot more flaws than anything really helpful to me. One thing I noticed from the essay that stood out was the attempt to try and connect with the reader. They tried to establish a personal comical feel by saying" ...you probably did it last night". I think this is off putting to the reader because they are assuming that everyone does it. This article though is written more for the skeptical reader. so their attempt wasn't very good and instead pushes the reader away in a sense. I realize when I'm trying to establish a connection I need to consider who my audience is and how they will take it. The next thing I noticed that didn't work was their attempt to try and over simplify the whole idea of why we pay so much for marijuana misdemeanor charges. "...all this for some black guys smoking reefer" I'm paraphrasing, but the statement though was racist and threw any sort of professionalism they had out the window. I knew before and know now that when your writing never say something that can make your audience hate you and sound untrustworthy.  I also thought they should have cited their sources better. It makes the audience less skeptical when you have information coming from a reliable source rather than just pulling them from thin air. I know that if I;m ever going to make some sort of claim I will back it up with reliable evidence.

#10

I've found both ways we've done peer review has been helpful. Working with one person is effective in being really thorough for the person I am working with and for myself. I put more time and effort into it since there is only one person to help. The group review is also effective because this time you have multiple opinions and critiques compared to one. I think it's helpful to have a variety of ideas compared to one. However it's not as thorough as the single peer review and is easy to get off track. Both ways work well but i prefer group review.

    One of my strengths as a peer reviewer is honesty. I try to give my real opinion and criticism without sugar coating it too much. I notice some people are afraid to say anything other than "it was good" because that isn't helping the person you are working with. I think it also helps people see things from other perspectives a lot more . I think I;m also helpful with getting someone to have more focus and structure in their paper. Which is odd because that's a problem I have with my own. My weaknesses though are noticing grammatical errors and helping others with good beginnings and endings. Generally I have no idea where to begin or end my papers so it transfers and shows in my peer review.

    My ideal peer review would being able to choose a group which I believe is strong and would actually be helpful to my writing. It would also be in a group so I can have more feedback and ideas. I would also like to spend two classes on peer reviewing so it would be thorough enough.

assignment #9

My first pattern of error tends to be my lack of explanation. I've realized this because most of the comments on my papers are "expand" or "explain more. Sometimes I forget that the reader may not know much of what I;m talking about or have any background information. I also just don;t know how to further expand and develop my ideas because I don;t have much of a second opinion besides peer review. I think by getting a couple opinions of people who don;t have much knowledge about what I;m writing can help my writing.
 My second problem is concluding my papers. I have horrible time wrapping up a paper with a strong ending rather than just summarizing what i wrote. I'm not sure what it is because i can write well for the main body of my paragraph but it's liek pulling teeth to end it. I think i over think what to write and it throws me off. I also think another opinion would be helpful to my writing and help me understand what would make it stronger.
My final pattern of error would be developing my idea, I don;t take the time to jot down my ideas and help em sort out my thoughts. I just start and go from there. It either ends up good or bad. If I took a couple days to really put my thoughts together my papers would probably be better.

Assignment # 8

     The article I chose was "The $78 million dollar bag". The article is written about what the city and county have payed and charged taxpayers for arrests made over marijuana. The article starts off telling us that even though there are cutbacks being made and taxes are increasing we are still spending millions of dollars on expenses for charges against marijuana. The article continues through out to prove that and also explain why the laws should changed but aren't being addressed. The article states that also that our courts are so clogged with these that apparently dealers with guns "get a slap on the wrist" and for some reason people with small amounts are the ones that suffer. The amounts of arrests that are made for having marijuana are equal to a couple crimes combined and has a huge budget. It also takes a very long time for police to process each charge and seems to include the time the police spend messing around in between. Even though they could be spending time on fighting real crimes the get paid for three hours of work in court even if they are only there for a couple minutes.
After a bunch of numbers are thrown around the article comes up with 78 million. That is the total cost that is spent on " jailing and prosecuting a bunch of black guys with reefer". They could not be anymore politically incorrect. After it states that legalizing marijuana was a huge suggestion for Rahm Emmanuels budgeting ideas the topic was never brought up. They also tried to reach plenty of political officials but hardly anyone responded. In certain parts of cook county people just get ticketed but that makes it confusing in the rest of the area to know what the law is. The article sums up with saying we are stuck at where we are at.

     This was actually the first article I chose and I;m glad i did. this is actually an issue that i am interested and have a strong stance on. I defintately agree that we waste time space and money on such small and ridiculous charges. Marijuana is hardly anything that should be worried about or be the reason our jails are so filled. There are plenty of studies that prove the legitimate benefits of marijuana.
    Besides my stance I find this article to have alot of flaws and some of the things said are astonishing. These writers sound like rookies, and maybe they are. There comparisons weren't very good and they lacked a counter argument. They also said plenty of things that were questionable and not very believable.

Assignment #7

Reflecting on back on the beginning of the semester I didn't have alot of goals set for myself. I just told myself do good and pass, not much beyond that. After starting the class though I really wanted to develop my writing abilities. I also wanted to be able to analyze and understand texts with deeper meaning. So far I fnd that I am doing better and pushing myself further. Though my teachers grading isn't the easiest I like that it provides more of a challenge.
    Some things I've found helpful are the class discussions that provide more insight into the text we are reading. I enjoy hearing other peoples thoughts and perspectives on things. It also helps me realize or look at something in a way I didnt before.
    So far I haven't found much wrong with this class. I find almost everything we do has a purpose and helps facilitate our learning better. Sometimes when we have discussion though we do focus on one thing for too long and then we have to hurry up on discussing something else. So we tend to let other things become less important.
     It really hasn't changed much. I still just dive right into what I'm writing and when I'm done I make revisions and corrections. However I do spend more time on it rather than do it the night before it's done. Which is better because it is a stress reliever and I'm not up all night.
    So far I'm not sure it's drastically changed from where I started which wasn't a bad place to begin. However, i;m not the writer I want to be yet but I don't think i will achieve that in one semester. I am learning new and important things and enjoy discussing texts more.

The purpose of this ad is to try and sell televisions by advertising it is good for family relationships, education, and keeping children proper. You can see this by the ads text but also the pictures of a "wholesome" looking family gathered around the television.
I think the target audience is meant for a Caucasian, upper middle class family, who wants to fit into the ideals of the 1950's. The text talks about tv making children smarter, keeping them in line "out of mother's hair", and spending quality time around a tv.
The genre seems to be 1950's tv ads. They do differ from today's ads because old ads try to appeal to the values of family and how good tv is. Today's ads are different because it tries to appeal to people's senses. Bigger, flatter, and high definition is what draws people in now.
The ad comes across as old school instructional propaganda. The tone it takes is upbeat and very matter-of-fact. It also tries to use "facts" in order to sell. The tone is meant to enforce the beliefs in a non aggressive manner.

Assignment #4 Revisions

• After reviewing my paper on the computer I see that there are alot less green and red lines on my final paper compared to my first draft,which is always a good sign. The paper though doesnt look that much different since my rough draft was in the correct format.
• There weren't any real large revisions I made. The revisions I did make were mostly being more descriptive of my surroundings. I also tried to make my conclusion sound alot more wrapped up and finished. I didn;t find that my paper needed a whole lot of revisions and neither did my peer reviewer.
• Some of my errors I noticed were wordy, run on sentences. Also sometimes my focus seemed a little bit off when I read over it.
• What guided my revisions were a mixture of peer review and re-reading my own paper. My peer reviewer said that all in all my paper was good, but I should have more details about my surroundings and my conclusion to sound a little more finished. I agreed with that and when I read over my paper I noticed the same things about the paper. Since i agreed with her those impacted my revisions.
• I think my strongest aspect is the way i described my feelings and surroundings. I know some of them sound a little melodramatic but it just aids to how i felt at the time about the whole situation. I think my weakest would probably be my conclusion. I had a hard time trying to wrap up my ending without sounding cliche or fake.

What seperates the A's from the C's

1. The first thing that separates an A from a C paper is description. A lot of writing becomes bland and boring because it is straight and to the point. When there are no good descriptions or visuals to imagine it is hard to find yourself becoming intrigued with the story the writer is trying to portray. A C paper would be something like. "It was a hot summer's day that made me thirsty." An A paper would sound more like " It was a particular brutal and scorching hot day. The heat was making me as thirsty as if I had been in the sahara." Not the greatest example, but you catch my drift. Good imagery makes for a good paper.

2 The second thing that separates an A paper from a C paper is organization. An A paper is well organized and has flow to it. A C paper doesn't always have great flow and can sometimes start becoming all over the place. When the paper becomes choppy and confusing it can throw off the whole idea, feeling, or meaning the writer was trying to convey. Composing how you want your paper to flow and where you want it to start and end can lead to less confusion and problems for the writer and the audience.

3. Finally, Tone is important to focus on when trying to write an a paper. Considering how you feel when you think about what you are writing. Being able to convey that to the audience throughout the whole writing is important. You want the audience to feel how you feel or expect them how to feel and the tone you take is how they will know. For example, you don't want to open a paper with a joke and then go into the paper with a dull, boring, or sad perspective. You want to keep the same feeling the reader had when they started. They'll probably feel a little thrown off with a whole new tone taken place unless it is made apparent for a reason.

I find my strengths to be description. I am generally good at being able to give a clear vivid description of something I am writing about. I like to be able to picture what I am reading or writing. It's important for readers to visualize what you are saying or they won't have the full affect. On the other hand, I don't think my strong point is tone. Sometimes I'll find my feelings being strewn about without considering how it will be conveyed to the reader. I am able to understand it because that's how I feel but it isn;t made clear to the reader.

Assignment #2 Generating Ideas

Topic 1. I may write about when I was in grade school we were assigned to write stories for the Young Authors Contest. This contest was meant for every grade level to write a story and make their own illustrations and create an actual book. I dreaded doing them every year because I knew I would never win. However, it forced me to be creative and see exactly what I could come up with. It really inspired me to be a better and more creative writer.
   - I think this could be a little sappy and force me to play it up more. I also don't remember what most of my stories were about. I also have to remember what it was like when I was a child which can be difficult.

 Topic 2. Another topic is my senior final for my english class. Our final was too write five papers one after another. On top of that we had to read them all in front of the class. The topics were also meant to be much more personal then anythign we had ever written before. The more honest your topic and paper was the better your grade. I was really nervous and apprehensive to write these but the more I wrote the better my writing you became. I also realized the more honest I was with others and myself the more people like them and the better my grade was.
    - This was really recent that this happened and I haven't written a paper since so I'm not exactly sure how much it has helped me with my writing skills to date.

What I expect out of English 101

When I found out I had to take Writing 101 I was a bit upset. My first though was "WHYYY?" I mean my best subject is English and Writing, why should I have to start off in a beginners class? Oh well it's required so i don't have a choice. After this first week though  I'm a bit more excited about this class than I was before. Things are being done different than I'm used to but I like it and I want to embrace it. For example, I've never wrote a blog before let alone for a class. It'll be interesting writing in an informal way for an audience that is my class, not just the teacher. There is also going to be a quiz after every assigned chapter so I'm forced to read or it will put me behind. I'm glad there will be something forcing and motivating me to work hard. I was surprised also to find out my teacher is someone who wasn't initially signed to the class. I'm hoping I will improve my writing and find a style that works for me. I'm also hoping I will learn a lot of things that I hadn't before. It seemed a lot of my previous English classes were just teaching the same thing over and over with the only thing different being the teacher. I guess that I'm really hoping to get a different experience with a college English course not just a repeat of every class I've had before before.